Healthy Mind, Healthy Life

High-conflict divorce isn’t just a legal process—it can feel like daily psychological pressure. In this episode of Healthy Mind, Healthy Life, hosted by Avik (with Sana filling in), we talk about what it really takes to stay grounded when conflict keeps coming and your emotional bandwidth is already stretched thin.

This conversation is for parents navigating custody stress, courtroom anxiety, and the fear of “messing up” their kids emotionally. Guest Alex Dane shares lived, practical strategies for staying steady, protecting credibility, and separating parenting from legal warfare—so survival can become a path back to clarity and self-trust.

About the Guest:

Alex Dane is a father, strategist, and survivor of the family court system. He’s the author of How to Win Your Divorce and The High Conflict Playbook (an Amazon #1 bestseller), sharing tools rooted in lived experience.

Episode Chapter:

1. 00:05:03 — Why high-conflict divorce feels like psychological warfare

2. 00:07:25 — “Least brain power, biggest decisions”: what nobody prepares you for

3. 00:10:47 — Accepting the system is unfair and building a strategy anyway

4. 00:12:06 — “Best interest of the child” vs. what the system rewards

5. 00:13:45 — Using anger, anxiety, and grief without letting them control you

6. 00:19:58 — Separating legal battle from parenting time: the “two worlds” approach

7. 00:26:16 — Does “winning” language escalate conflict? A grounded reframing

Key Takeaways:

• Accept early when collaboration isn’t possible—then shift into strategy, not denial

• Treat strong emotions as signals and fuel, but process them safely outside court settings

• Protect your credibility: calm, clear communication often matters more than perfect facts

• Create a “transition ritual” between legal work and parenting (pause, reset, support call)

• Journal the inner journey so anger doesn’t become your long-term identity

• Keep kids out of adult processing—use external supports so children don’t become emotional caretakers

How to Connect With the Guest:

• Substack: https://howtowinyourdivorce.substack.com/ 

• Book: High Conflict Playbook by Alex Dane on Amazon

• http://www.howtowinyourdivorce.com/ - Sign up for the waitlist for presales for How To Win Your Divorce and get a Free chapter and divorce checklist.