Welcome And What We Promise

SPEAKER_01 0:06

Welcome back to Healthy Mind, Healthy Life, the show where we trade quick fixes for real tools you can actually use in your life. Hi Marchita, and tonight I'm sitting down with a guest whose story is going to land hard for a lot of you. Amy Goford is a best-selling author, a top-rated clinical and stage hypnotist, a motivational speaker, and a mom of five who quietly rebuilt her own life from the inside out. She has lived through severe depression, debilitating anxiety, and a long-term illness that almost took her life. And on the other side of all of it, she has spent years helping people stop giving their power away to fear. Tonight we are talking about the one truth at the center of her work that you are hardwired to rise above fear, not bypass it. Not pretend it isn't there, just rise above it. And by the end of this conversation, my hope is that something shifts in you, even just a little. So Amy, welcome to the show. It's such a pleasure to have you on this show today. Thank you so much. It's great to be here. I'm really glad you're here, and I am also looking forward to this conversation a lot because I think it's going to be life-changing for a lot of listeners out there.

Listener Disclaimer And Ground Rules

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So before we start, there is a gentle disclaimer to our listeners.

SPEAKER_00 1:32

Hey dear listeners, before we begin, a quick note from Heldiman Beyavek. This episode is created for educational and informational purposes only. The views shared by our guests are their own and may not reflect those of the host or network. Nothing in this conversation should be taken as medical, legal, financial, or professional advice. Please consult a qualified professional before making important decisions. We encourage you to listen with curiosity, think independently, and use this content as a starting point for reflection, not a substitute for professional guidance. Now settle in and enjoy the conversation.

SPEAKER_01 2:11

And now that we have this out of the way without wasting any further time, let's dive into the conversation.

Why Nearly Every Problem Is Fear

SPEAKER_01 2:18

And Amy, before we go anywhere big, I want to start somewhere honest. So most people uh who do this kind of work didn't arrive here through a textbook, they arrived through their own life experiences. So, was there a specific moment for you, not the polished origin story, but a real one where you realized uh fear had been running more of your life than you had been willing to admit?

SPEAKER_02 2:48

Well, the epiphany came with clients, actually. I had been doing many, many sessions at that point, especially for depression and anxiety. But people come to me for all types of issues that they want to solve. And at some point, I had that aha moment where I realized all of the problems that people come to me to resolve are somehow related to fear. Now, certainly I've overcome fears in my own personal life as well. But that's where the epiphany for the book came. I realized all of these issues are somehow fear. That's all that they are. And then as I looked bigger, I realized, and all the world's problems are fear, except natural disasters. But other than that, every other world problem that we have with greed and poverty and you know, sexism, racism, whatever it is, wars, violence, it's all fear. So that and you know, of course, like I say, I can reflect on my own life. I have stories in my book about overcoming fears that I had. I have a whole chapter about insecurities. We all have certain insecurities about ourselves, but it's how we handle those insecurities that is vastly different. So my chapter talks about how some people handle insecurities about themselves just fine, and you know, they live a really great life, happy, thriving, despite the insecurities. And then you have all the way up to the fact that the tyrants and the dictators and the people in the world that hurt others the most are extremely insecure, and that's how they handle their insecurities, not even knowing that that's what's really going on. So, fear is a really interesting force in our lives, how we deal with it, what it does to people. So, yeah, that it just thinking about fear and analyzing it just helped me to think bigger and bigger and look at all the details about fear. And what I really wanted to let people know with my book is okay, so we have fear, right? We all know that our world has way too much fear, but why are we allowing this? Why are we just going along with it? We are better than this, we are made to be better, we deserve better, and we are literally hardwired to rise higher than this and stop letting fear be the ruler of the world. We are the ruler, we are the power.

SPEAKER_01 5:53

I think I'm really glad you brought that up because I definitely agree. I think fear is, you know, playing such an important role in all of our lives without us knowing about it. I mean, it's dictating so many parts of our lives unintentionally. So it's really important to get over it and you know to get on the driver's seat of your own life instead of sitting on the passenger's seat and let fear drive it. So yeah, I think what you're doing, it's it's really great, and this really sets the tone for this conversation. So I'm excited to know more about what you do as well, which brings me to another topic.

Necessary Fear Versus Unnecessary Fear

SPEAKER_01 6:33

So, Amy, there's a really common misconception that brave people don't feel any fear, that they've somehow risen above it because they have something the rest of us don't. So, from everything you've lived through and everything you have witnessed in the people you've worked with, what does the truth about fear and courage actually look like?

SPEAKER_02 6:56

That's a good question. Everyone has fears. And let me just clarify, too, that in my book I talk about the different types of fears. Now, basically, there's two categories: there's necessary fear and there's unnecessary fear. Underneath unnecessary fear, there's a million other fears, right? Fear of failure, fear of what other people think of you, that kind of stuff. So, what is what do I mean by necessary fear? It's the kind of fear that we need to keep us safe and alive, right? I mean, fear does play an important role in that. But when you think about that kind of fear that keeps us alive and safe, how often in our lifetimes do we really need it? Just a few, right? Like most people were not facing life-threatening situations all the time. Some people might be. But the average person, right, is not gonna have need that kind of fear all the time. It's just when you're almost in a car accident or if something right happens, if you're being chased by an animal, stuff like that, right? Now, incidentally, some people need more of that kind of fear. They're a little too risky, and it sometimes doesn't work out because they are too much of a risk taker. Where, you know, that sometimes that fear that keeps us safe and alive didn't actually serve them and keep them safe and alive. Okay, with that said, going back to your question, yes, sometimes it seems like people are super brave. I'm here to tell you, though, that everyone has fears. So even those that seem like they're completely fearless, they still have certain fears that we may never see from the outside. You know, for example, I had a client a few years ago that she seemed really fearless, right? Super brave. But then her hidden fears that we had to resolve for her and work on had to do with fears, what fear of what others think, right? The people pleasing, the I'm not good enough kind of fears. And they ran deep. And so she and I had a lot of work to do. She didn't even realize that these fears were affecting her so much, and it turns out that they were affecting every aspect of her life. So even people that seem fearless, they have things in there, right? Certain fears that just we may never know. So we as far as like, yeah, so there's those people that do brave looking things that still have other insecurities or fears that might not, you know, look as good as bungee jumping or whatever it is, skydiving that they do, right? That seems brave. And even, you know, I recently went swimming with sharks about a week ago, and I used to be so afraid of going into the ocean that I would only go up to my knees. And here I was swimming with nine-foot bull sharks, which are the number three most deadly to humans. No cage, by the way. Now, so from someone else, right? Because I posted about that, that think, oh, she's so brave, which I am in that aspect. But they haven't seen the journey that I went from only going up to my knees in the ocean to swimming cage-free with deadly sharks. What does the average person do then? It is, it can be a journey. First and foremost, though, you have to understand that you are more than what you think you are. So often, far more than you want to know, people are critical of themselves, and people don't have as high of an opinion about themselves as they need to. So, this is my message, right? You are way more than what you think you are.

SPEAKER_01 11:24

I think that's definitely true, and I think a lot of people misunderestimate, they don't know what they're capable of, and they are afraid of trying that out as well. But there's this definition of fear that I have heard before, and I think that applies here, and that makes so much more sense now that I've talked to you. It's false evidence appearing real, that's what they call the full meaning uh of fear, and that's that's so true. And what you just shared, I think that's such an important reframe because so many people are quietly waiting for permission that they are never going to get from fear in the first place. So, and I think this misconception that brave people don't have any fear, that's that's just very wrong because they can just hide it better. But everyone has this fear. But I hope after this conversation, a lot of uh listeners will know how to actually deal with it.

SPEAKER_02 12:21

So, yeah, and that you know, I've heard that too: false evidence appearing real, which is a great definition.

Practical Tools To Reprogram The Mind

SPEAKER_02 12:28

In my book, I talk about what the real fear is, so I explore fears, but most importantly, my book is about here's why you want to rise above it, and here's how. So every chapter of my book has hypnotic techniques or mind reprogramming techniques or calming techniques, stress elimination. I have a whole bit about how to eliminate stress. I have here's how you reduce anxiety. So it's how as well, not just, yeah, you're hardwired to rise. You gotta get rid of that fear. No, I teach you step by step. I take you into details about here's what you do exactly to rise above it. And so in my book, I'm not gonna tell you because that would be a spoiler alert, but as I explore all these different fears that have a huge effect on our lives, I talk about what the actual real fear behind all the fears is. There's one thing that is behind every fear that we have and how it affects us. And so you have to read my book to find out what that is. But yeah, there is there is one all encompassing thing that's behind it all.

SPEAKER_01 13:54

I think I think your book is it's it's going to be really helpful for a lot of our listeners out there. And I think what you're doing is amazing because a lot of people don't really talk about this enough, and yet it's fear, it's it's something that we deal with on a daily basis without us actually knowing. So it's really important. Thank you so much, honestly, Amy, for everything that you have shared today. And now I want to ask you something really important before we close.

Define What You Want Then Act

SPEAKER_01 14:25

So, for not for the listener who's already doing the work, but for the one who isn't yet, the one who is sitting somewhere right now, exhausted, scared, maybe quietly convinced that this kind of freedom isn't really for them, what would you want them to hear in this exact moment?

SPEAKER_02 14:47

Well, you first have to start to know what you want. If you right now, as a listener, listening to this, have some area of your life that you're not satisfied with. Maybe you're not making the kind of money you want to make. Perhaps your relationships, personal and professional, are not what you want them to be. Maybe your health is not what you want it to be. Maybe you're not as confident as you want to be, right? So there's a number of areas of your life. Maybe you don't sleep as well as you want to, right? Like I could go on and on. You suffer with depression, anxiety, whatever it is. Maybe you have bad habits, smoking, or something like that. So you first have to know what you want. If there's any area of your life that you're not satisfied with, you've got to know what you want. Once you figure out what you want, then that's where this all comes into play. You know, you ask someone sitting there thinking, I don't know if I can do this or I don't deserve it, or whatever the limited beliefs are. What do you want? Right? Once you establish what you want, what area of your life, how do you want it to be better? You got to be more specific too. Just don't just say, I want to be rich. That's much too vague, right? What's rich to you? And then that desire of wanting will start to help you take steps into your full potential. You've got to understand, like I mentioned at the beginning, you're more than what you think you are, and you deserve more. And it's okay to want more, and it's okay to know that you deserve more. It's okay to want better relationships. In fact, it's good to want more money, right? Like, because that gives you more freedom and the ability to help others and to make the world a better place when you make more money. So money solves most things, right? So that desire for more money is good. What would it solve in your life? How could you help others? What kind of peace of mind does it give you? So, yeah, then you take those steps and understand that all these things are in your mind. Now, this is where, you know, I'm a hypnotist, I help people reprogram their minds. So I've done thousands and thousands of sessions with people for right, depression, anxiety. I help people stop smoking in one session. Things like that, because your mind, that's where it's all started. So if you're sitting there doubting yourself, what good is that doing for you? How is that doubt, those fears, those limiting beliefs, how is that serving you and those that are close to you? Wouldn't it be better to start believing and start having positive beliefs and to start to make those changes in your mind that take you to higher levels of achievement, higher levels of happiness, health, better relationships, right? Like, why not? Life is short. Even if you live to be a hundred, life is still really short. My dad died a couple months ago. He was 88. And I know that his life went fast. You know, for me, I couldn't believe that he was already that age and everything. And so life goes fast. So look at it this way, then, with that perspective. Do you want to get to the end of your life? Right? You're old, you're you know that you're at the end. Do you want to get to that point and look back at your life and say, I'm so glad that I stressed my life away? No, right? Absolutely, right? Of course you're not. And I'm just kind of being silly. How do you want to look back at your life? Right? Do you want to look back at your life and say, thank goodness I figured it out? Thank goodness that I allowed myself to understand my power, that I allowed myself to think bigger and to understand that I could have more, that I could be a more positive influence to the world. You know, in my book, I talk about the ultimate solution to fear. And again, I'm not gonna spoil it. You have to read the book, but I'm gonna I'm going to mention that like we are here to make the world better. As a human race, we're all in this together. You know, we're not here to compare or compete or to hurt each other, we're here to help each other. We're here to be a global team, a global family with caring and service and making the world a better place. So all these little steps add up to big steps. So take the first step today and just believe me when I tell you that you're more than what you think you are, and start to figure out exactly what you want. What do you want in life? What do you want to improve? What do you want? So write it down and figure it out and start finding out how to get what you want. Now I can help you with that, and you can reach out to me because it is in your mind, and I help people get what they want all the time, every week. Numerous people helping them get what they want because it is in your mind, and you can get what you want. You're amazing.

SPEAKER_01 21:14

I think a lot of our listeners needed to hear this. So, first of all, thank you so much for sharing that, Amy. And I love how grounded and practical that advice is because you're not asking them to change everything overnight, you're just asking them to take the first step and then take it one day at a time. I think that's that's the most important part. And honestly, thank you so much, Amy, for every meaningful insight you've shared with us, all the wisdom that you have brought into this conversation today. And if there's one thing that I can take out from this conversation, it's that you weren't built to be ruled by fear, you were built to walk through it with your whole self still intact on the other side.

Where To Find Amy And Closing

SPEAKER_01 22:03

So, Amy, for anyone listening who wants to find your book, follow your work, or learn more about how you help people, where's the best place for them to go?

SPEAKER_02 22:15

Amykofer.com, A-M-Y-K-O-F, like food, or d. So amico.com. You can also find me on social media, but to get resources to reach out to me, to work with me personally, you want to go to my website, and then you can contact me through there, and we can work together. We can resolve your issues, get you moving forward in life.

SPEAKER_01 22:48

Amazing. Thank you so much for sharing that, Amy. And we will drop all of that in today's episode notes so it's easier to find for our listeners so that they can reach out to you whenever they need to. And thank you for being here tonight, Amy. And thank you to everyone listening. So, if something in this conversation gave you a small breath of freedom from a fear you've been carrying for far too long, sit with that before you scroll. That little softening is the work. That's where it starts. This has been Healthy Mind, Healthy Life, part of the Healthy Mind by Avik Network. I am Archita. Until next time, breathe a little easier, walk a little lighter, and remember that you were never meant to be ruled by fear.