Welcome And Guest Introduction

SPEAKER_00 0:06

Welcome back to Healthy Mind, Healthy Life, a show that believes real conversations have the power to change lives. I'm your host, Yusuf, and today I have the privilege of sitting with someone whose story reminds us that the road to a healthy life really looks like what we imagined at the start. She's a four-time fitness champion, a founder, a humanitarian, a speaker, and now published author. Her Debbie book is called Life in One Shot. And if the title alone does not tell you something about who she is, the pages inside absolutely built. Jennifer Jen Hendershot. Welcome to Healthy Mind, Healthy Life. We are so glad to have you here today.

SPEAKER_02 0:58

Thank you so much. Thanks for having me, and I hope you are doing well and all of your listeners are doing fantastic.

SPEAKER_00 1:07

Perfect.

What Life In One Shot Means

SPEAKER_00 1:08

So before we dive in, I have to ask you this first because I think it sets the tune for everything. When people hear fitness champion, they picture trophies, stages, and highlight reels. But your book is not really about that, is it? And what is life in one shot actually about, in your own words?

SPEAKER_02 1:32

You're exactly right. I always used to say that trophies collect dust, but the lives you change is what matters. And so that is what my book is about. My book is about not just winning and being the best at something, but what you do with those titles after. And that's using that platform to go out and make a difference in the world and help people of any type that might need assistance, whether that be through love or finances or guidance or just even motivation. So I just use myself beyond the platform in the world every day to help make a difference in individuals' lives: men and women, children, adults.

SPEAKER_01 2:32

I see.

The Myth Of Looking Put Together

SPEAKER_00 2:33

And Jen, there's a version of the fitness world that that gets sold to people. This idea that physical strength is equal to inner strength, that if you're disciplined with your body, you must have everything else figured out too. From where you have stood, as someone who's lived inside the world at the highest level, how true is that really?

SPEAKER_02 2:59

That's actually a really clever comment because that is very true that people think that. It's not real, it's not possible. I mean, I think when you're at the highest level, it's incredible, but at the reality is I'm still a human being. I still have a ton of drama. I still have a ton of struggle, and there's still a lot of life to figure out. I'm still figuring out after competing and doing my competitions after writing the book. I'm still trying to figure out life. And so I'm just more open and focal about it. And so I try and take time to just kind of share that what you're asking, that message that just because maybe we look perfect doesn't mean our life is perfect.

SPEAKER_00 3:56

Yeah. And that is such an important distinction. What the world sees versus what you are actually carrying. I think so many people can relate to that.

SPEAKER_02 4:10

I agree. I think that social media gives people a perception that there is perfection in the world, whether that's with your family, your body, your relationships. I think social media has made it very difficult for people to decipher what's real and what's not, and who's happy and who's not. I came through a time in my career where there was no social media. So I personally love social media because I'm allowed now to kind of share my ups and downs and my struggles. So for me, I have found it very rewarding, but I can also see how confusing it can be for so many people.

SPEAKER_00 4:55

Yeah. And

Grief, Loss, And The Role Of Training

SPEAKER_00 4:58

your book goes deep into grief, losing your father, your brother. And I find that fascinating because grief and fitness don't often get talked about in the same breath. But you walked it together in your story. What do you think loss actually did to you? Not just emotionally, but in terms of who you came out of it.

SPEAKER_02 5:28

I would say that grief definitely reminded me when I was competing and I was focused on being the best at something. That reminded me that life is so much more than being the best. You know, life is where time is limited. We have very little, you know, time on earth. And so I can't always be so self-absorbed. I need to be bigger than life and bigger in other people's lives, where I can go out and make a difference. And I can hopefully bless people and open other people's eyes to the reality of that life isn't just about me, but life is about helping and giving and serving the community, serving others. That's how that's what I've learned through losing family members and through the ups and downs of winning and losing. I think I've learned that, you know, serving others is really what serves me and brings me satisfaction.

SPEAKER_00 6:41

And was there ever a point where physical training became a way to, you know, outrun the grief or did movement actually help you move through it?

SPEAKER_02 6:55

Yeah, I think I don't think that was the plan, but I do think that, yes, you're correct. I think exercise, even today, now that I'm retired from competing, even today, exercise is an outlet for me. Sweating and letting go of the endorphins and the stress and the heaviness in my heart that, you know, people carry every day has allowed me to kind of use exercise as a scapegoat. That's for me to go in and kind of pound it out and like let it all out. And, you know, I'm less emotional through the day because I'm kind of exerting it somewhere else. So, yes, absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 7:41

There is something really honest in what you are sharing. You know, the idea that body can hold grief before the mind is ready to face it, and that the gym can be both a refuge and a way of avoiding. And it takes real self-awareness to know the difference between.

SPEAKER_02 8:05

Absolutely. I absolutely agree with that. I feel like there's many layers to a person, uh, physical, emotional, spiritual, mental. And I think each part of my life I've had to work at one layer at a time. You know, like you said, like I can have like the most perfect physique, but I could be a complete train wreck here. So I need, so I've always kind of like worked on this while I was working on the body, and then I work on, you know, the emotional side and this, you know, the spiritual side. There's so many layers, right, to grief and to life. And so I think you have to kind of tackle them one category at a time.

SPEAKER_00 8:56

Yeah.

Redefining Health Through Gratitude

SPEAKER_00 8:58

And you spend years inspiring women through Fat Camp, through speaking, through your platform. But I want to ask about the women in your audience who may who may don't feel like champions right now, who are someone in the middle of their story, not sure it is going anywhere good. So, what does healthy actually look like for someone like that in your experience?

SPEAKER_02 9:28

Well, that's a great question. I think healthy looks very different for everyone. I truly believe that we were all not given the same opportunities, the same life, the same guidance. I think it depends on the person. So each person can kind of determine, you know, what healthy is for them. I would say that if you are happy, then with whatever life you're living, that is truly what matters the most. It doesn't really matter what I say. Some people don't like the way I live my life, but I don't really care because that doesn't pertain to them. This is my life. These are the choices I've made. And so I would encourage women, I would encourage men and women to, you know, be kind to themselves. I think people are very hard on themselves. I think people self-sabotage themselves. And I think that that is what kills a dream and a life faster than anything is when you self-sabotage, you know, I'm not good enough, I'm not skinny enough, I'm not pretty enough, I'm not handsome enough, I'm not tall enough. I think these are the things that really destroy people. And I think we should feel really blessed, you know, by the simple things in life: two arms, two legs, 10 fingers, 10 toes, the ability to walk, the ability to smile, the ability to go to work. I mean, it's how all about perspective and how we visualize and I guess look at gratitude and what you're thankful for every day. And that is how you should live your life is through gratitude.

SPEAKER_00 11:17

Yeah. I I love that framing because I think we have been sold this idea that the health, health is a destination, a before and after photo. And what you are pointing to is something much more honest. It it is like a relationship you build with yourself. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 11:40

I agree 100%. It's a it's all about with ourselves. I think everyone's trying to chase something else, and they're all trying to please everyone else instead of taking care of themselves, they're taking care of everyone else. So I agree with that.

How To Keep Going When Numb

SPEAKER_00 11:58

And and your book is called Life in One Shot. This idea of living fully without apology, that's a powerful stance. But but for someone who is exhausted, burned out, being a little numb living fully, but cannot feel or cannot ask a lot. So, what does that actually look like for someone like on a Tuesday morning when nothing feels inspired?

SPEAKER_02 12:28

Yeah, I've been there. I can relate to that, where you just maybe don't feel like, you know, maybe moving forward or life is really worth moving forward. I would say my best advice is to turn to people who truly you trust, have tough, tough conversations with them. If you go to church, go to church, pull your pastor aside. If you're open to getting counseling or therapist, be open to that. But talking to someone you truly trust, a family member, a friend, a spouse, somebody that you can just and just cry. Just let it out. Like just say, you know, life's hard. You know, life is hard. It's hard for you, it's hard for me, it's hard for everyone who's listening. I mean, nobody gets a pass of greatness. Like nobody is gonna not take on difficult times. We're all going to face difficult times. So just know you're not alone. Like we're all in this world together. We're all putting on the uh fight of our life. And so just, you know, be again, be kind and uh be patient with yourself.

The 21-Day Habit Reset

SPEAKER_00 13:50

And is there a practice or mindset shift, like something small, not a you know, five-day plan that you personally come back to when life feels flat or heavy?

SPEAKER_02 14:05

Yeah, you know, I tell people 21 days is a really that's a long time for a lot of people, but three weeks, 21 days to change a habit or to force yourself to do something. I remember, you know, at one point I couldn't get out of my bed after losing my father. I mean, it was it was days, you know, and I was like, every day I was like, I just gotta get up, get my shoes on, go for a walk. Like, because I didn't think my life could go on without him. But life truly has. And I had to come back and live this life for him. And I had to live this life for me because I had too much to give to the world. And so for me, 21 days, I was like, okay, 21 days. I'm on day 14. Can I go one more week? And every day you just try to check off a box for 21 days and create a habit, no matter what that is, whether it's weight loss or, you know, maybe you're not, you don't want to drink any more alcohol, or maybe you want to go, you know, maybe you want to be nice for 21 days straight. You know, you just like a ticking time bomb every day, or maybe you want to take a nap every day. Maybe it could be just something so small, but 21 days is really an ideal way. Cut out sugar 21 days, you know, cut the carbs 21 days, everything. It takes a little time, and that will test your discipline, your patience, your commitment, and you'll learn a lot about yourself, what you're capable of and what you're not capable of.

SPEAKER_01 15:43

Yes.

Service, Humanitarian Work, And Burnout

SPEAKER_00 15:48

You went through enormous personal loss, built a career, then started humanitarian work from scratch, raising funds for hurricane relief, rebuilding communities. That kind of sustained giving. It takes something. And there must have been moments where you hit a wall. So, how do you keep going when the purpose feels heavy instead of inspiring?

SPEAKER_02 16:18

Well, that's a really good question. I would say that I have to, I always remind myself that the world is not does not revolve around me. The world revolves around us. And so the world needs people like me to serve them. They need me to pick them up, they need me to advise, lead, and be disciplined because I am I am made of giving. I know that my heart is very big and very, I get most satisfaction in life by doing for others. That's just truly what makes me, I think, tick is knowing that, like tonight, for example, I'm making a meal for a family down the street. Why? Because I can. And because it cost me, you know, $15 at the store. I gotta put it in the crock pot, put it together, and drop it off because it's a single dad with two kids, and I want to help. So for me, that serves me. That feels me feel good, and it's helping someone who's really working hard to get ahead in life, and that's what life's about.

SPEAKER_01 17:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 17:38

And what would you say to someone listening who really wants to live a more meaningful life, but keep stopping at this threshold? Like keeps waiting until they feel ready.

SPEAKER_03 17:53

I'd say you have to take care of yourself first.

SPEAKER_02 17:56

You have to serve yourself first. Make sure you're happy and you have a peace at home and within yourself and your heart. And then you can give your time, you know, your energy and your blessings to others. But if you're feeling exhausted, you always have to address yourself first to become more alive, more awake, more giving, more aware. But it starts with yourself for sure.

SPEAKER_00 18:31

Yeah.

Where To Connect And Final Lesson

SPEAKER_00 18:33

Jennifer, for people to want to connect with you or want to learn more about your work, there can they do that?

SPEAKER_02 18:40

Absolutely. You can I have a website, Big Shot S B-I-G-S-H-O-T-T.com, I think. And you can find me on there. You can message me. I I answer emails from people all over the world. People just maybe have a hiccup or a problem or some need some advice. A lot of people have been sending me feedback on the book, Life in One Shot, which you can get on Amazon and 70 other retailers around the world. Sending me a lot of great feedback, which is really awesome. And of course, yourself and many podcasters have really welcomed me on their show. And I'm just so thankful to be a part of it and share my space.

SPEAKER_00 19:24

Absolutely. And to everyone listening, all these links are in the show notes. So just go and check those out. Jen, is there any last message that you want to leave us with?

SPEAKER_02 19:36

I'm gonna say one thing, and that's what my dad taught me. Learn to live with live on life's terms, or you will not make it.

SPEAKER_00 19:49

You know, this conversation reminded me that most honest lives, the lives the ones lived with courage and purpose, are never the ones that avoided the hard part. They're the ones that walked through them anyway. Absolutely. And if something in today's episode landed with you, my listeners, share it with someone who needs to hear it. And if you haven't already, subscribe to Healthy Mind, Healthy Life wherever you listen to your podcast. Until next time, take care of your mind, take care of your heart, and keep going.